To this date, I still hesitate to put on the hijab. Just a piece of scarf, but the weight of wearing it seems too heavy for me.
For a while now, I have tried to put the hijab on when I am alone at home. Looking at myself in the mirror, I see a strange face. A different person, a stranger.
If the girl with the hijab is such a stranger to myself, I wonder how others will see me? Will they be surprised? Will they be shocked?
My husband always said that the decision would be mine, and he would not push me to do anything. He, however, does remind me from times to times how important it is to follow God’s command.
I always say “God willing”. Sometimes I even accuse him of not understanding the weight of wearing hijab for a modern Muslim convert.
But I know it is just me. The voices in my head. The decision I have to make.
